Eye Contact

So the first thing people notice almost immediately is eye contact.  The impression most individuals get when someone doesn't look at them in the eyes or doesn't look at them at all is that there being rude or something is strange about that individual.

For individuals like Abbie who have Autism - this is one of the first signs - has a hard time looking at you and giving you eye contact.

I noticed this almost immediately after Abbie was placed in my arms in China.  But the agency said before we went that "some children will not give you eye contact till they have attached with you as parents.  And that attachment may take a while when they get to their new home."  So we didn't worry.  But has the months went by I thought we were going to have attachment issues because she was just not responding and looking at us.

As we continued with TEIS and the developmental play group it was brought to our attention that the first signs of Autism is the lack of eye contact.  Since they have known Abbie they came to the conclusion that she need to be tested.  Not just be cause of the eye contact mind you but it was one of the major factors.

Over the last few months her eye contact is gotten better but nothing like a typical individual would have.  Since she has been in at Brown her eye contact has increase by leaps and bounds.  We even had her God Parents over a few days ago and we couldn't believe that she looked at them, not for a long time but she actually looked at them.  She noticed them.  This was a major major major achievement.  I almost wanted to cry right there.  I know that she may never get comfortable looking at people but wow it was amazing to see her acknowledge that they were there.

We want to teach her that looking at individuals is ok and that it will be hard but she can do it.  It will help her social abilities with her friends and others around her.   This is one of the main parts of her therapy to learn to give eye contact and acknowledge others around her.  They do this by making her look at them before she gets something she wants.  This is hard to watch because sometimes she just has such a hard time with it, but I know this is best for her. 

So for now its a growing process and one day at a time, hopefully we will have better eye contact in the future